Final Four

Maybe I’m Amazed Too

All hell has broken loose at Idol while The Inky Jukebox has been out of the country! Scotty’s the only man left standing! Haley’s still there! Lauren’s still there! WTF!

So the final four duets featured two country songs, showing that Idol at last acknowledges that share of its audience. It doesn’t hurt that both Scotty and Lauren both fit that niche. 

The girls shared a Miranda Lambert classic, “Gunpowder and Lead” which The Inky Jukebox feels in completely inappropriate for Idol’s pre-teen audience. Yes, in a hypocritical spasm of prudery, we wonder what, exactly, the Idol producers want to share with their young female viewership. In this song, the protagonist downs a couple of six-packs and smokes cigarettes while waiting for her abusive ex to come home from jail whereupon she plans to blow him to smithereens with a shotgun. Your usual family fare, don’t you agree?

The girls massacred it, sadly, neither being fit to touch the hem of one of Miranda’s woeful red-carpet dresses.

The boys, on the other hand, got to share a song that was designed to be a duet — between Brad Paisley and Keith Urban, two serious guitar-slingers, and it’s much more age-appropriate. It suggests to young chaps that they pick up guitars and “Start a Band” to have fun and get girls. Hang on. OK, nevermind. 

The boys managed to destroy that one, too. 

Now that we're down to three, The Inky Jukebox has to call Scotty for the winner (because we, too will shoot ourselves with a shotgun if either of those girls win).